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Thoughts on Writing for International Readership

By Diana Gardner Robinson Leave a Comment

When I came to the United States after being raised in England, I quickly discovered that the joke that they are “two countries divided by a single language” has strong elements of truth to it. How much more difficult can communication be between cultures that do not have a common source or a common language? Since September 1997, my experience in working with an international clientele and writing an e-zine that was reaching more than forty countries has taught me to be extremely careful when putting my ideas into words. Here are some thoughts may be useful to those who communicate across national and cultural boundaries.

1. Keep it supremely simple. Many people read English language ezines and other publications as a way to polish their use and understanding of the phrasing. If you need to use unusual words, do so in a context that will make their meaning clear. A great vocabulary needs to be an aid to clear communication, not a barrier to it.

2. Avoid idioms and slang. These change their meaning from one culture to another, sometimes with quite offensive (though occasionally hilarious) results.

3. Remember that the correspondence between weather and the calendar differs across the globe. When referring to a time of cold weather, write “winter,” not “December.” As an example, while I watch the snow fall, my cousins in New Zealand are complaining of the heat. Many Australians celebrate their Christmas dinner as an outdoor picnic, and a white Christmas is pure fantasy.

4. Remember that many nationally recognized holidays are just that. They are not internationally recognized. How many national holidays of other countries do you know? Should we expect readers to recognize ours if we are not aware of theirs?

5. Try to discover holidays and days of significance other than just those that affect you and your culture. An awareness of other holidays not only enables you to include mention of them with sensitivity, but it also puts all holidays in a clearer context. For example, Christmas is not universally celebrated, in any country, and Thanksgiving is largely American, though many other countries have a Harvest Festival of one kind or another.

6. Avoid being overly informal. In contacts with subscribers, clients, and customers, recognize that use of first names to people you do not know may be  socially unacceptable, even insulting, in many cultures.

7. Be careful when referring to people well-known in your culture without explanation. While the scandals of national presidents are probably familiar world-wide, the name of a sports player famous in your country may mean nothing to readers elsewhere. If you need to use someone as an example, include a brief explanation as to why s/he is relevant. The same thing applies to sports teams. I sometimes show students a movie from New Zealand in which reference is made to the national Rugby team, known as “the All Blacks” because of the uniform they wear. It is always necessary to explain ahead of time to U.S. students that the words “Not an All Black in sight” does not have a racial connotation.

8. A similar principle applies to geography. Most people know where major cities are. However, if you refer to lesser known areas, add enough description to show where it is and why it is relevant to the point you are making.

9. Don’t sound condescending. To too pointedly acknowledge that some readers may not know what you mean may sound condescending. To assume that they do know is to appear insensitive. Best balance is to include a few words that clarify your meaning without being too obvious about it.

10. As you work, write from your heart, proofread with your mind, and in your thoughts keep an image of the many and diverse peoples who inhabit our fragile, wonderful planet.

Steps towards Peace of Mind

By Diana Gardner Robinson 2 Comments

Peace of mind is not just something that comes to us when everything is going well. It is something that comes from a combination of many sources, and that can sustain us even when things are not going well. Even through tragedy. Ten things that contribute:

1. Reserves. Not necessarily the large reserves that we sometimes refer to in coaching (though those would be wonderful, too), but knowing that you are not going to run out of the minor things that can easily cause disruption in our lives, e.g. gas/petrol, postage stamps, toilet paper, essential food items.

2. Forgiveness. Know that you need not be full of anger, or nagging hostility, toward anyone, including yourself. Remember that we all do the best we can with what we believe we have. There are few people who harm others on purpose, though many do it through ignorance.

3. Acceptance… of self and of others. In the same vein, know that the only person about whom you have the right to make decisions is yourself. Others will be what they will be, depending on their own combination of circumstances, genetic inheritance and choices. For yourself, your choices are and always will be your own. Don’t berate yourself for your past, it is past. If you don’t care for it, make the decisions necessary to create a different future.

4. Clear conscience. Act always as though someone else who you respect will know what you do. If you would not want others to know that you did something, then don’t do it, for you (and quite likely someone or Someone else) WILL know.

5. Support. Know where you can turn for support, for a shoulder to cry on, and for other forms of help when you need it. Know your friends, keep your fences mended, and keep a list of agencies and institutions to which you can turn if you must. Never let pride stop you from requesting help when you need it.

6. Surroundings that you can enjoy. Your surroundings may not look like a magazine cover, but they can be kept sufficiently tidy, organized, and attractive that you feel pleasure as you look around you. We often think of surroundings as what we are aware of visually, but the other senses may be involved too. We may need music, or silence. We may choose to enjoy the scent of burning candles, or of baking, or of well polished furniture.

7.  No undone have-tos, deadlines, overdue debts. These will diminish peace of mind every time. Decide on a schedule to get rid of them. If you have to call on someone to keep you on schedule with this, enlist a friend, a family member, or even a coach. Just knowing that you are making progress will enhance your peace of mind. Catching up on these things will do so even more.

8.  Know that you are connected to Something. If you are religiously or spiritually inclined, then you already know this. Even if you believe there is nothing beyond us except nature and the earth, then at least you know there is that. Know that you ARE connected. Trust that connection, and know that you DO belong.

9.  Know that you are at choice, not a victim. Recognize that in almost every situation, you DO have choices. If you feel you do not, look again, and see that what you have previously dismissed as lack of choice is actually a choice that certain alternatives are unacceptable, or that you had not seen them in the first place. Reconsider your options. Brainstorm with someone you trust.

10.  Know that you can affect your world, that you need not be a pawn. Sometimes it is difficult to imagine that any one person can change the world. We certainly need to change ourselves before we can change anything else, and even then we do not have the right to change other people. Yet the changes that we make in our own behavior, our willingness to reach out and help, volunteer, to try to make the world a better place, CAN be far-reaching. If every person reading this list were to reach out… Imagine!

Things to do when your lifestyle is too chaotic

By Diana Gardner Robinson Leave a Comment

While you are thinking through these processes, do not let yourself become trapped in *either/or* thinking. Life rarely has to involve only A or B. Often there are Cs and Ds and even X, Y and Z. Often, too, there is a way to combine A and B or whichever. Be creative. Don’t worry about how it’s been done before, or about what people will say. It is what you will say, how you will live, and how you will feel, that are important.

1. Be clear with yourself that you are not settling for living like this forever, and that there is a way to change it. To say that you have no choice simply means that you are rejecting the choices that you do have. It may not yet be time to make decisions, but try to imagine every possible path you could take, even the ones you would probably reject, and see where each path would lead you.

2. Carefully and honestly examine your own contribution to the situation. Based on this, decide what lessons you need to learn so as to change the situation and not recreate it. Do not allow yourself to blame others for everything. They may have had a part, but you probably made some choices too. What were they?

3. Find a true support group. This does not mean a group of friends who will play “ain’t it awful” with you while you play the victim. It means people who will support you when you make wise decisions and give you honest and constructive feedback when you do not, and who will stand beside you regardless.

4. Whatever form this group takes, keep going regularly, speak honestly, listen to feedback without getting defensive. Remember that everyone is there to get help. When it is offered, accept it. When you are able, offer it.

5. Journal regularly about both feelings and events. If you have old journals, re-read them. Seek the patterns in yourself and your situation. Re-read objectively. What advice would you want to give to someone else who had written what you have written?

6. Examine your priorities. What is truly important to you? Is this where you are placing most of your time and energy?

7. Decide, thoughtfully, exactly what it is about your life that you don’t want. Be very precise here. Do not mistake the superficial symptom for the root cause. What is really happening that is causing you problems?

8. Consider what you have that you want to keep. Pause for a moment to express gratitude for it. How much of this would you lose by getting rid of what you don’t want? Is there a way to keep it and still get rid of the unwanted?

9. Carefully and in full and vivid detail, visualize yourself experiencing whatever it is that you do want. Try to imagine yourself experiencing it with all of your senses. Do not let any thought of not having it intrude. Know that, at some level, it is already yours.

10. By the time you have gone through this process you will know what you need to do. Calmly and firmly DO WHATEVER YOU NEED TO. Do all of it. When you have done all that you can, don’t keep striving. Release your situation and trust whatever other forces are operating in the universe to operate. You will find your chaos subsiding and being replaced by calm. 

Stages of Detachment from Negative Emotions

By Diana Gardner Robinson Leave a Comment

Life does not always go our way. People can be thoughtless or cruel. Things happen to which we over-react, often because they trigger old feelings from way back in the past, when we were helpless to deal with them. Sometimes we respond far more strongly than is warranted by the present situation. Neither we nor those around us may realize that the strength of our reaction is based not on what is happening now, but on something that occurred far in the past. As we grow within ourselves we learn to be less affected by such situations. Here are some of the stages we may go through as we grow.

1.  You respond furiously to anything that upsets you. You are convinced you are right and that your response, however strong and intense, is appropriate. The situation continues to replay in your head, and to upset you again and again, long after it is over. 

2. You become aware that you are feeling negative way beyond what is appropriate to the current situation, but you can’t stop yourself from expressing your fury. When the situation is past you are unable to stop yourself from recycling it in your mind.

3. You come to the same realization but now you manage to pull back from acting out or yelling. However, it continues to bother you long afterwards.

4. You recognize what past situation the anger was really coming from. and why the present situation triggered it, but still have difficulty in not reacting inwardly.

5. You become able to laugh at yourself as you look at the way your gut is churning, recognizing that it is really about something that actually happened long, long ago.

6. Your gut no longer churns and you congratulate yourself on staying calm. However, the person stays in your head and you (calmly) continue to rehash what you really should have said and imagine yourself “winning” or being proven right.

7. The person or situation remains in your head, but now you are able to consider your opponent’s point of view. You may be able to allow the person in your head, the one from the past, to present their viewpoint without inventing ways to slam-dunk them.

8. When the situation is over, it is over. You are able to evict the person from your head as soon as the situation has ended.

9. You get that whatever it was may have been a lesson that you needed to learn, and you resolve to act upon that learning. You no longer need to attach blame to the situation.

10. You get immediately that that the situation is not important and will not change your life. You don’t allow it to distract your behavior or your thinking. You observe it, respond appropriately without interference from your gut, and move on. You are at peace.

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