Sometimes staying focused on our goals too intently and too long can narrow our viewpoint. We may forget about the world outside, the other people, and the new things and thoughts that we could be enjoying. Sometimes we can get lost in this effort to attain something that we think is a true-goal when, actually, it is a mere passing fancy. Somehow, we always need to make choices when it comes to goals, and the shiny objects can be hugely seductive… and disappointing
What is the difference between a goal and a true-goal? (I will admit to making up the term, as far as I know.)
A true-goal is what we are really trying to attain by focusing on our goals. It is what makes us happy in a deep, soul-fulfilling and long-lasting way. (Author Mike Dooley maintains, in his book Playing the Matrix, that the one true-goal is, quite simply, happiness.)
You want a fancy car? What will it give you that you don’t have with the old jalopy? Envy from the neighbors? Admiration? Will that make you happy? Fulfilled? Joyous? For how long? That, the fulfilling and joyous feelings that last, have staying power,are the true-goals, and bright shiny objects are rarely true-goals.
Think about the car – or the corner office – or whatever, may have been the goal that you believed would get you “there,” to that sweet spot of fulfillment and real happiness. Will it? Or will it leave you asking sadly, and perhaps not for the first time, “Is that all there is?”
That, understanding what we really want underneath the surface, beneath all the superficial glitter, that is the question that can keep us happy and fulfilled. It does not leave us asking that sad, “Is that all there is?” question as we look back at all we had put into attaining something that was not, after all, a true-goal. When we realize it was just a fast fading, passing fancy it is too easy to fix our gaze on yet another shiny, and set ourselves for yet more discontent.
A true-goal often relates to your real purpose in life, whether you recognize it or not. It usually harms no one, and often benefits many, which is exactly why it makes you feel fulfilled and happy. That is the kind of happiness that lives deep in your heart, not the kind that comes with just having purchased the next shiny thing.
Don’t focus on the frosting on the cake, but on the nutrition below it. Not on the corner office but on the enhanced opportunities for good that being in that office will give you.
Chosen wisely, true-goals will benefit our world in one way or another, just as it will benefit you and yours. To figure out what our true-goal is we need to know ourselves with brutal honesty. Doing that is the first step toward knowing what our true-goal may be.
To learn more about choices, and choosing wisely, please explore this website, and subscribe to “Work in Progress (because we all are)”, my irregularly shared and non-sales-oriented newsletter – see top right on this and all other pages.